He was waiting for me in my car when I got out of work-he even took the fuse out of the car so I couldn't start it.
As soon as you saw he got physical and tried to control you at this level you should have turned around and called a cab.. and then packed and went to a friend's place for the night.
I am TELLING you.. give him TIME to ABSORB the SHOCK. You cannot negotiate with him while he's in SHOCK.
DO NOT even TRY to ASK him what he THINKS his affair does to OW's marriage... why did you even ASK that.. he is JUST going to dismiss it and then HE feels MORE SURE of HIMSELF.
When you argue, HE digs his HEELS in and gets MORE sure of his OWN position.. you cannot argue with an addict... they ALWAYS WIN
NEVER dignify him physicaly controlling you, your car, or anything surrounding your person by conversting - LEAVE RIGHT AWAY
NEVER NEVER NEVER converse with someone who is physically trying to DETAIN you.. its ILLEGAL for starters.. you are allowed to come and go... do NOT let him control you like that.
Just give him a few days to cool down... do NOT engage him. If he tries to bait you into any kind of conversation LEAVE
"My position is clear, if you press this affair any further it will destroy TWO families... "
and you WALK AWAY... do NOT try to PERSUADE him of that claim.
THE ONLY way to get through to him is to say something SIMPLE and DIRECT with NO DISCUSSION to argue it.
When you cheat - you hurt your children = good
Do you think your cheating hurts children at all = bad
WHen you cheat you hurt children BECAUSE yada yada yada.. = bad
If you are gonna hit him, keep it direct and simple and then LEAVE it RESONATE if you let the subject change he will FORGET what you just said
