Huband is having an emotional affair

[ALJ]

I hope everyone has had a Happy Easter.

My H drove up to visit the kids on April 1st and he left to go back home this morning. He stayed with us and slept on the couch or on the floor like he usually does as I don't have a spare room. When he got here, the kids were overjoyed to see him. He greeted me with a one-handed hug, like he did not want want to touch me at all.

For the most part, H and I really had no communication at all with each other(a major problem in our marriage to begin with) and I was more mad than anything during his entire stay. I did not take my anger out on him. I showed it by the way of silence. Every time I wanted to laugh at something he would say or talk to him, I would think about him and the OW. During the first couple of days H treated me like he was doing me a favor by talking to me, like I am the one who is in the wrong and is doing the cheating. Every time his phone made a noise indicating that he had received a text message, I automatically assumed it was the OW. I guess I have a problem with acting like everything is okay with us by having a normal conversation with him. I guess he feels the same way.

On Friday, we barely saw each other. The kids and I went shopping for Easter and when we got back, H was gone to visit friends. Later that night the kids and I went to Good Friday church services and when we returned, H was asleep. Saturday was the worst day. I left that morning to finish up some shopping and the kids stayed with H. I told H that I would not be gone long but unexpectantly, I was gone for 4 hours. When I got back, H was mad because I had said that I was not going to be gone long and he was supposed to be going to his sisters for a BBQ with the kids. I asked him why he did not tell me this as I would have returned sooner and he said that he tried to call me but I did not answer(my phone doesnt receive signals in certain stores) plus I said that I would not be gone long. Well, my feelings were hurt and I held back tears while we got the kids ready to go with him to the BBQ. After he and the kids were in his car, ready to go, he calls me and asks if I am going. I reluctantly agreed.

At the BBQ, H really didn't talk to me unless it had something to do with the kids. At the end of the night, I called H and blew up at him because he had left the BBQ to take his brother somewhere and did not let me know he was gone. It had been 2 hours that he had been gone and I called him and yelled at him, basically asking him would it have killed him to tell me that he was gone because I did not know. Yelling and arguing at him is not in my nature and I rarely do it. He did not have anything to say other than that his sister knew where he was but when he got back, he tried talking to me by asking me if I was ready to go or if I had eaten anything, etc. His demeanor changed.

Sunday came and we barely saw each other except for in the morning before the kids and I went to church. After church, the kids and I went to see my MIL. Our conversation soon turned to me and H. I told her how things were going between H and I and she said that every time H comes to visit, she sees a change in me. Not a good one either. She then said that maybe H should not stay at my house when he comes to visit and if he wants to see the kids then he is more than welcome to stay at her house and have the kids visit him there. She thinks this might wake H up to the damage that he is doing to us. Whatever I decide to do, MIL says she supports me in it. I just don't know. I am thinking that that arrangement will upset the kids as they don't see him a lot. I would like to know what everyone thinks.

As it came closer to the time for H to leave for home, I saw glimpses of the old H. He started loosening up and talking to me about mundane things but I could still tell that he was uncomfortable around me. When it came time for H to leave, it was 4am and he came upstairs to tell me he was leaving and not to get up because he would turn the lock on the door. I got up anyways and he gave me another one handed hug. He said he will call me when he got in ( I doubt it if he calls, he usually sends me a "I made it back" text) I did start to cry a little and he left. I don't know if I acted appropriately during his visit. Are you still supposed to act upbeat and happy in front of the WAS, even if there is OP in the picture?