Calling all affair annihilators & boundary setters

[courts0818]

I haven’t posted for awhile…DD and I have been sick & I’ve been working more hours. But…I need advice. My H finally admitted to having an affair last night. I don’t know any details; I just know he finally stopped lying about it and finally acknowledge it. It tore me apart. I guess I really knew the truth before he admitted it, but somewhere deep down I just didn’t want to believe it.

Before our conversation last night, I had been giving serious thought to seeing a new lawyer and confronting H – telling him he needs to make the choice or I’m making it for us. I know which lawyer I want to see, I just haven’t had the appt. yet – but I did do the research and found out who others recommend.

Since the start of the year, things have been going better and H was acting like he might actually want to move back home and make changes. He was spending more time at home and just seemed more interested in us. Things were far from perfect, but there were good things going on. But now I’m so confused. He told me last night about his unfaithfulness around 7:00pm (in a text…yes in a text…but that’s bc I wanted answers and I didn’t care if it was in a text or in person). It might seem ridiculous that I wanted to hear him admit it, especially after all of the evidence I already had – but personally, it was just something I needed to hear. I had to hear it from him.

So now that he’s admitted it, where do we go from here? Now I’m the one that doesn’t know what I want. I feel totally betrayed and sick about everything – all of the lies, all of the time wasted, the pain he’s caused and so on.

I turned my phone off last night and he’s been texting me – asking if there is no chance for reconciliation or for him to move back home, that he just wants an answer from me, etc. He’s sent me about 6 texts and I have ignored them.

He’s coming over tonight to see DD, what do I do?