Man, I totally understand that those things weren't worth arguing about to you. I am learning that's part of where the problem was for my wife and I.
If you are like me, you will shrug off the the insignificant things that don't matter to you. It's possible that for a long period of time, your wife has stored up all these "insignificant" things. Perhaps they were significant to her, but she felt she couldn't reach you, you wouldn't listen, etc.
You and I have some similarities in how our wives feel. I don't think my W is having an affair either, though I couldn't swear that on a stack of Bibles since we are separated. Though divorce has been filed, wife has not completely shut out the thought of our marriage, or at least that's what she has said and I'm going to trust that.
So, here's my wisdom to you. You don't have to follow it. But every day, in the decisions I make while we are separated, I try to think "what would my wife think of this decision?".
Us guys can piss each other off, go have a beer, and it's all good. We let it go for the most part. There may be things that happened long ago in your marriage that your wife didn't let go of, and you keep making decisions without thinking about what it's like in her shoes when you make those decisions.
Again, not harping on you, I'm just hopeful for your marriage and letting you know what I've learned over the past few months.
You have done a great job as far as getting work. Be the breadwinner that your wife is looking for. Be compassionate and listen to her. Protect her. This will get you respect.
