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v1olin Offline OP
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Great Gucci! I am now armed and ready to handle it!


Me 35
Wife 34
Two daughters 8 years and 3 years
Bomb 3/30/09
W filed 4/16/09
We met in'92 married in 2000
Divorce final
Joined: Apr 2008
Posts: 1,408
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Ok. Hang on. I am going to show you how this is done.


Time for YOU to take charge of things here.

Women are attracted to men who know what they want and men who are decisive. They also take a step back and begin to wonder if they are doing the right thing when the man they were dumping suddenly becomes the dumper. Get strong and stay strong.

You are NOW the dumper... Get it?


By the way... Get all the child support coming to you. Don't compromise.




Last edited by gucci loafer; 04/06/10 05:24 AM.
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v1olin Offline OP
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Oh ,I get it alright!


Me 35
Wife 34
Two daughters 8 years and 3 years
Bomb 3/30/09
W filed 4/16/09
We met in'92 married in 2000
Divorce final
Joined: Apr 2008
Posts: 1,408
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Good.

The attitude is you don't need the drama and don't want women drama in your life. When the drama starts, you are gone. Life is too short. Life is good. I have things to do and places to go. I don't have time for drama. Let's wrap this up. Hurry up.....


That is the attitude. In a hurry. Places to go things to do and time is a wastin........ No time for chit chat.

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v1olin Offline OP
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I have had very minimal contact with her for almost 3 months now. Should I contact her often about getting it done now? asap?


Me 35
Wife 34
Two daughters 8 years and 3 years
Bomb 3/30/09
W filed 4/16/09
We met in'92 married in 2000
Divorce final
Joined: Apr 2008
Posts: 1,408
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If you meant what you said to her. (and I sure hope you did)
then if she doesn't respond........

YOU take action. You don't need her permission to speed things up. Get things going from your end. You be the one to take the bull by the horns. You will get much more for yourself when they initially want out than you will by waiting and giving them time to think. They will usually be much more compromising when they want out.


If you don't mean what you said, then you put yourself in another dilemma and more drama. When dealing with women, you need to say what you mean and mean what you say. Always be nice, but it is ok to be firm and decisive.

If she responds slowly you need to SHOW her you meant what you said. Why would you wait for her to do everything? That is weak.

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V1olin,

Your situation is very similar to mine.

I have a real problem trying to make the right decision. My WAS is making plans for her 'new' life, and treats me without any respect.

I react to her actions rather then being proactive, though if she takes things from our home like children's photos without asking, then I will do the same.

Gucci, could you look in on my last post as I need a bit of advice.


Bomb dropped: 19/12/08
Me:48
WAW:41
D:10
S:6
Married: 15 years
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Quote:
My WAS is making plans for her 'new' life, and treats me without any respect.



Lesson to learn here...

You ALLOW her to treat with without any respect.

Sometimes the bully doesn't treat someone with respect until that person is willing to "take on the bully and fight".... that is how many a bully respects or does not respect a person. Only those willing to stand up to the bully get their respect. Food for thought.

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v1olin Offline OP
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She responded this morning, mostly business as usual from her. The lat part she states- "there is a lot of complicated stuff related to the 401k and pension to get figured out. I am waiting until my medical leave to take care of it as it should take a long time on the phone." blah blah... sounds like excuses to me.


Me 35
Wife 34
Two daughters 8 years and 3 years
Bomb 3/30/09
W filed 4/16/09
We met in'92 married in 2000
Divorce final
Joined: May 2009
Posts: 1,045
V
v1olin Offline OP
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She did say, "I am not intentionally holding this up..."

Haha! I did not even accuse her of holding it up. smile

So here is the response I am thinking about sending,

Wife,

This is what you wanted, please get it done ASAP.


Me 35
Wife 34
Two daughters 8 years and 3 years
Bomb 3/30/09
W filed 4/16/09
We met in'92 married in 2000
Divorce final
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