WAW Using God II

[pigskin]

They are going to try to get my W to sit down with them and me together. She is all about that church now, so I'm hoping she will listen to them and agree to meet.

This is an evangelical christian church, right? The one that's giving your W all the faith that she's found through having an affair?

You seem like a logical guy, so let me give you some logic. People like this do not see hypocrisy and lying as being a problem with their faith. If anything, the biggest liars and hypocrites I've ever met are the ones who proclaim the most loudly that they are in like flynn with God.

They aren't.

You need to take time and see this for what this is. Your wife is using God in the same way she might use shampoo or makeup: to make herself look better.

Look at the facts. Baptism is supposed to be a profoundly moving experience right. On Easter, no less. And the thing that your wife does to show how much her faith means to her is to invite a man that she's having an affair with to witness it. Along with you, the one she's married to? She was so moved by the experience that she goes on facebook to put pictures of this instead of spending the most holy day of a Christian's year by spending time with her kids? Who needed to see this pics? Obviously, not God, he was there. Who is she trying to impress with her photo shoot?

And think about the message you told about Jesus taking punishment before his death. The moral of the story isn't about how much he suffered. That's not the lesson to learn. The lesson is it illustrates how cruel people can be to one another. It shows how far a person will go to degrade another. The reason it happened to Jesus is for you to learn not to let other's degrade you. He went through that punishment for you.

You are throwing his sacrifice back in Gods face by not learning that lesson.

But back to my original point. The debate you are having - or the one you want to have with her pastor - is that she's not acting like a Christian by being hypocritical. These types of Christian accept hypocrisy, it's not a problem to them. They don't see the splinter in their own eyes while they are pointing out the logs in anothers. If anything, this wingnut attachment to letting God lead the way encourages them to be even more hypocritical.

The more they sin, the more they can repent later. In loud ceremonies, no doubt with pictures put up on fb. Your wife hasn't found God.

God is love; He makes us see the best in ourselves and treat each other with kindness.

He sent his only son so we wouldn't have to suffer. God doesn't put obstacles in our path to make us stronger. He gave humans the greatest of gifts, free will.

God is not a prankster who thinks this ridiculous behavior by your wife is what will bring you closer to him. If anything, it is with a deep sadness that God looks down and sees all these false witnesses influencing your wife, and more so, a greater sadness to see her falling victim to it. But it is because he loves us so much that he allows us to make these mistakes. God will not step in, but I bet he hopes that you and your wife see this whole issue is fraudulent.

What's that line: People will know we are Christians by our love?

Not by facebook photos and affairs. Snap out of it. Use the gifts God gave you. Use your free will to step away from these evil people.

Thanks, knittedscarf, for your reply. As a Catholic, my church's doctrine conflicts with some of what you say, but that debate is for another board.

It is not an Evangelical Christian church. It is a generic, non-denominational Christian church, many of which you see all over the country. 80% of the members are actually Catholics, who have an issue with the Catholic church I guess.

They are not at all like you describe, I've met many of them. And while I have some disagreements about what a Sunday "service" should be, those who run the church are serious about faith, and not the phony, demonstrative hypocrites the bible denounces.

Only a couple church members know about our situation, and the ones that do are appalled at my W's behavior. They are not judgmental, but they do not condone it one bit.

So the only one to blame for the evil behavior is my W and the OM, who both claim to be serious about Christianity, but only those parts that don't make them feel bad. Namely the "God hates divorce" and "Thou shalt not commit adultery" parts. Her actions are inexcusable and hypocritical, you are absolutely right. But every time I move to bail, something pulls me back. Maybe eventually, when it is the right time, there will be nothing pulling me back. And then I'll know.

I don't know if the church pastors can make a difference, but my W loves that church to death, so maybe she'll listen to them. She's avoided speaking to them this long, as she knows what she's going to hear.