To be honest, having read your update I was feeling blue, too. Your M seems so full of possibilities, but how can you make a blind man see when he doesn't want to? Not now, at least.
I can see why you aren't angry. He's lost and can't find the way out of his mess. He's got himself lost along with his past issues. The help of the IC hasn't helped you, although it may in the long term.
My faith teaches that God never sends a test greater than a person can handle. You've done great, considering the emotional turns - don't lose that strength now! You'll need it as you rebuild, with or without him. Your life will continue and develop no matter what, so do the best you can with it. Enjoy your memories and find strength and direction for where to go. Memories are parts of us that are good - you aren't losing those good times with your H.
I hope you can find the way to open him up to you. Praying for it is a good thing to do. I wouldn't pray only for that.
