Today is day 14 NC- and I feel great....I was invited to an Easter dinner last night and met some very interesting people and got to know my friend a lot better...I have met an amazing person but am not going to make things more difficult on myself right now.
After dinner I recieve a call from OM1's GF...we spoke for a very long time...she thanked me for being "a stand up guy" and for having the integrity and courage to alert her of the EA/PA...
I already know how badly W berated me to people, but OM1's GF confirmed this- and I do not care.
OM1's GF also told me that my prior concern w/ new OM is correct- that he is very much into drugs and the "life of the party"...it's sad that W has gone back to those days- and I'm sure that it will only be a matter of time before something happens.
I had wanted to attempt an intervention- but now, I have ZERO credibility w/ W's supports, so I will do nothing.
My GAL-ing has introduced a great opportunity and a new and wonderful friend...
This is good. Just remember some of those feelings that you are experiencing may resurface but it looks like you have a good handle on dealing with them.
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I have met an amazing person but am not going to make things more difficult on myself right now.
Be careful dude - you are still vulnerable right now and you may not want to jump into something this early. Having said this...enjoy yourself dude YOU deserve it!
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and I do not care.
This sound like anger to me - try and work on letting the anger go (I still struggling with this so please do not take it the wrong way - I do understand).
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Today I woke up happy
A very good place to be buddy.
Dude - you are an impressive guy. You have handel yourself with class and dignity. You should be proud. Your doing great man.
God Bless, Eric
"The difficulties of Life are intended to make us BETTER,not bitter". "Fear is a prison, where you are the jailer. FREE YOURSELF!" "Life is usually all about how you handle Plan B." - Jack3Beans
Thanks guys... Had a great time this evenin, went to the dog park w/ my friend.
Gonna do some reading tonight- I literally had a skip in my step today and no problem whistleing and smiling- REAL PMA...for the first time in months...this is prob the way I was supposed to be when W was in the house.
Oh well...better late than never.
Day 14 now behind me...feeling great- prepared to go the distance and hope to one day soon write that I honestly dont know how long its been since I spoke to W.
Some love for her is there...I found myself journaling that at this point I would be "curious" to see if things could work out...I remember being SO dumbfounded when W toild me that same line- I couldnt understand how you could use the word "curious"...
Now I do understand.
Letting yourself out of the darkness is pretty darn amazing- wish I could have started to let go more sooner.
Thanks all or the continued support- wish I had better news about the M- but I am saving myself and that's the most important thing.
Good! My W texted me the other day about my S - I responded and ended my response with have a good day. IMO try and keep any interaction civil and nice. Show her what she is missing!
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I'm day 15 and still feeling good
I can't wait to see what your post is gonna be on Day 65
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will need to find some cheap or free things to do.
I knew all those movie trips were going to add up Seriously, you can go jog, go for a walk in the park, read, I am in a similar sitch in terms of finances and I have had to get pretty creative - you can do it buddy.
Have a good day man...keep having good days.
Eric
"The difficulties of Life are intended to make us BETTER,not bitter". "Fear is a prison, where you are the jailer. FREE YOURSELF!" "Life is usually all about how you handle Plan B." - Jack3Beans
Thanks for checkin on me Wild and Eric- I am doing very well, people at work are seeing the Happy Jasper again- they even ask me what's up...I know that it's not all me...it's a combination of detaching, seeing a new and exciting life, and being inspired by someone whom has shown me a new way of looking at life...
I am very concerned that I am no longer concerned w/ what happens w/ W. I have read other people say that there is a real danger in detaching too much...I feel like I may be getting close to that line.
I mentioned this morning about W's text message last night...I did experience some anxiety over it, but spoke w/ some friends at work and was able to not feed into things by replying.
I believe the text was brilliant on her part- a ploy to spark curiosity- vague enough to mean just about anything...I view it as complete manipulation- one friend even said it was psychological warfare on W's part.
I do love her, but I do not respect her for what she'd doing, and truthfully, I don't know that I can see myself going back to anything w/ her.
It is soon, my new attitude is too young to truly guage anything on...funny that even still I am able to be rational about things...the detaching and removing myself from the drama and not acting on impulse has allowed me this opportunity.
I've been angry, sad, and crushed for about 7 months now- I never thought i'd see the other side, but it is there, even if my original goal has not been, nor ever may be realized.
I see clearly, the mistakes I made in my R/M- NEVER succomb to schedules and routine- if you do double up on communication-
For the first time GAL is effortless...
I know I'm still on the rollercoaster, b/c I'm still M...so I will not think this feeling will ever go away.
