Im journalling I can't get over the feeling that = yes, we both have problems, yes we both made horrible, destructive mistakes. H doesn't want to take the risk of these things happening again = but is unwilling to look at his side. It is so hard to let go knowing and believing that if he were willing we could overcome all these things. Now that he has a gf, he is comparing me to her and sees our M as a huge mistake. The pain of this is unbearable as I never want to give up.
I guess this is LRT. I am going to set up a call with a DB coach. I barely have a chance left, but maybe just maybe if I can DB right, I can get my H to be interested in trying again.
Meanwhile, sitting with the pain and the shame that he isn't. Proud that I am resisting the urge to "talk about it" tonight - which is what I wanted to do this morning and you all good people talked me out of it. Thank you.
