None of us wanted to separate/divorce. However, there are times when we have no choice but to do what is best for us, i.e., finances, assets, well being, etc. When you meet w/your lawyer, look at the situation as a business deal and think w/your head and not your heart. You have to consider everything that you and your children will need to survive in the days, weeks, months and years to come.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
