The journey begins

[NoCodeBlues]

Hey, CTH, Happy Birthday!

[awest1217]

Glad you are having fun!

[ClingingToHope]

I'd give the trip a B+. Lots of pictures to put up. We definitely had some down moments -- D7 and D11 constantly picking at each other.

The family we were staying with got me a birthday cake and had some little gifts D7 and D11 could pick out to give me.

Got home almost without drama until they fought over who would grab the suitcase off the luggage carousel. So I had to separate them and wait 10 minutes for them to calm down and apologize.

During the time, D7 tried to sneak out of the airport and D11 informed me she doesn't live with me.

Sigh.

Finally, they calmed down and we made it home. I grabbed the mail and -- bigger sigh -- W's interrogatories are in it. So I'll be working on those this week. I'm trying not to let it ruin the day. We're just laying around right now. They both need baths and we have eggs to color.

Things are going to be very complicated for the next couple of weeks.

[ClingingToHope]

Wow. That was a long day. We painted Easter eggs in the afternoon. I made them dinner and then took D7's to a friend's house to play with their daughter while D11 and I went to see the Miley Cyrus movie, "The Last Song."

The writers piled tragedy after tragedy into this movie.

When it was over, D11 was a tearful mess. What I realized when it was all over is that I'm being toooooo tough on her right now. I need to figure out a way to be strong with D7 while being sensitive to D11.

Interestingly, they both called W today and she never returned their calls.

Those are her issues.

[mishka422]

You are right, those are her issues and make sure you don't let that reflect on your parenting style. It's easy to overcompensate when you think they are being neglected.

Glad your trip was loads of fun, even with the picking on each other (that's typical for siblings isn't it?).

I know I said it in the alt, but happy birthday (belated) here!!

[ClingingToHope]

A lazy Easter. We made it to church on time. D7 really likes her new Sunday school room. We ate after and then just came back to apartment and sat around until 5 p.m. D7 headed outside a few times to play. D11 just sat in a chair watching TV and playing solitare on her computer.

After nine straight action-packed days it was good to just relax.

But I was sad when I dropped D7 off. D11 rode her bike home. We spent a lot of time together. W came to the door with this big grin and I couldn't look at her. She didn't mention my birthday -- I didn't expect her to but deep down hoped she'd say something.

I've got mediation this week and interrogatories to fill out -- so I'll have enough of her occupying my head.

This is one reason I will not budge on keeping them on Sunday nights. I don't like having to "switch." The only reason I did it this week is because I have to be up at 4:45 a.m. to go to opening day in Cincinnati (5 1/2 hour drive).

My goal is to enjoy Monday.

Get through Tuesday, I have a counseling appointment in the afternoon and divorce support group at night.

Get through Wednesday, which is the first mediation session. I hope to calmly listen. State my case and not take the bait if W throws it out there. I don't need to make points or win arguments.

By Thursday I should be doing OK. This next weekend is my only free one of the month and I've got plans for Friday and Saturday nights -- so I'm getting there.

Final bonus. My sister sent me a bunch of her unused gift cards. It was a great gift. There's a $100 for Burlington Coat Factory so I can take the girls shopping in two weeks. There were several others. Tonight I got a cheapie vacuum cleaner at Walmart using her $30 gift card so it cost me just $27.60.

That's important because as of Friday I'm putting myself on a strict budget. For 11 months I've been like Jim Carry in "The Yes Man." If someone asked me to do something, go somewhere or try something, I said yes just to keep me from laying on a couch watching TV and feeling sorry for myself.

Well, I'm feeling good about things overall and it's time to stop burying myself because I'm not going to have my girls grow up to see me broke. I survived and thrived 15 years ago, before W making $8 an hour. I can survive and thrive again.

As far as the girls. They've got two more months of school and then I have three full weeks with them this summer. I may not be able to fill it with as many trips as I did last summer, but we'll fill it with something. I'll get creative.

[BobbiJo]

Sounds like you are doing well! The trip, a good birthday (Happy Birthday by the way!), then a relaxing day to wind things down...

Sorry the movie was a downer for your d. My D3 is handling things in a weird way, to me. Today we were playing on the playground and she wanted to pretend her husband dumped her? Then she said he got a new girlfriend so she went and got a new boyfriend....all said with a smile on her face? They all find their way to work through things. You are right you will have to decide how to handle each of your daughters according to their needs.

Enjoy opening day! My BIL that I stayed with over this weekend is a scout for Toronto Blue Jays. I am a National League fan myself...

[ClingingToHope]

I love modern technology. We're about 40 miles north of Cincinnati. Although I was born in Illinois, we lived in Cincy from 1977 to 1981 -- until my parents divorced -- and saw more than 100 games.

So this trip always feels like a Muslim's trip to Mecca.

A few thoughts about W today. Mostly it's sport talk. This is my 9th straight opening day trip. I was wondering if I can do this another six straight years. I'd like to make this streak last longer than the M -- which will be at 14 on April 27.

I'm going to see the Cubs play the Nationals that day so I'll be nowhere near W on that day.

[v1olin]

April 27th is my birthday!

[ClingingToHope]

Lots of stuff swirling together this week. Taxes are due in a week. Mediation ($200 each) starts tomorrow. Summer camps have to be picked out and paid for in the next eight weeks. D7 wants to go to Y Care and I've asked twice whether W wants me to sign her up. D11 wants to audition for the church band next week. It's W's night so I asked her to make the audition time.

No response to any of this. Just an email that I owe her $41 for an overdraft.

She doesn't like corresponding by email. I don't want to talk on the phone during work and she doesn't want to talk at night.

Oh joy.

First day back from vacation and I've finished 12 of 20 to-do list items.