Need a Plan for My Marriage

[sandi2]

You can learn the steps to take in exposing W's A over in the infidelity forum.

[LSG]

Hi sandi2,

Thank you!

I am so hurt and upset right now. My wife is back to her old self. She leaves her dishes lying around. She does nothing at home. She is always planning something on the weekend with the kids without me. She never asks me to go. I am so pissed at her right now. She spends money that we do not have and does not even discuss with me our plans for Easter. I am so not good at DBing. I love her, but I do not like her at all right now.

I am trying to deal with it but its me right in my heart. We use to go together as a family. I just hate my situation. It is a horrible existence. I wish it would change soon. I do not like what is happening, and I feel that our marriage will never survive, and that is not what I want to have happen. I wish I could do more to change things, but unless she wants them to change I believe that we are finished.

I am just so angry at her and what she is doing. What a selfish excuse for a W.

[LSG]

This is a terrible day. I miss the kids, and I even miss her. I miss my family. I try not to let her know, but I have never been great at hiding my emotions. I hate days when she takes the kids somewhere without me. I just feel so hollow inside right now. I am trying to cope, so I took a walk and left my cell phone home. All I could do was think about how my family is in a mess. I have not had any appetite this week. I have not really eaten much this week. I just feel empty, and I do not want my M to end, but I just feel the end is near for my wonderful family. I am so sad for the kids!

I did not hear back from the recruiter on an interview with the hiring manager for a position I really want. I think this would help to keep my mind off my stitch. I hope and pray everyday that my stitch with change. I need money for legal fees because she said I would end up on the street with nothing. I know I should not believe her, but She has so much financial support to fight me forever. Anyways...

I know I should not feel hate for someone, but I truly hate the OM. I have not been able to get the information on him to contact the OMW. The money order was lost in the mail for the PI too. I feel that I am being hit while I am down. I know it sounds like I am depressed, and maybe I am. I just feel so hurt by all this. I know all of you here have your own suffering and pain. I just don't think I do as well as most of you here at dealing with it. I read the other posts, and I am amazed by all of you. Everyone is so much stronger than me. I want to post to everyone, but I barely can post my own stuff these days.

I wish everyone the best here, and I do want to say keep up with your faith that you will be okay. I will do my best too, but sometimes lately I feel that I am losing hope to save my M. I love my wife so much, and I don't know what else I can do. I think I am messing up on this DBing. Anyways, I have a lot to get out today. I just needed to write. I hope this will help for a few minutes if even for a moment I will be happy. Please everyone be happy too if you can. My prayers are with all of you!!!

I really appreciate everyone's support for me and my stitch. I really have needed a place for some support!!!

[LSG]

My W wants to send our daughter to Japan this summer to see her parents for a month, and I told her "NO" she will not go, but she keeps asking my daughter is she wants to. My daughter said no. I think her parents are up to something. I am so angry that she is trying to do this when she knows that I will not allow. I need to know if she can do this without my consent.

[LSG]

Yesterday was crazy after my wife came home from the Space Science Day 2010. She told me that she set up a play date with a classmate of my daughters without telling me when I had planned to do Easter egg coloring with the kids. She did not tell me about the Space Sciend Day 2010 either, just said she was taking them.

They did go from about 1:15 pm to about 4:00 pm. We walked far apart from each other on the way there. When we came home I told that we need to take the Easter presents back because we did not have enough money in our account for them. She needed to talk to me so we determine how much we had to spend to buy some nice Easter presents. We are very limited on money, and I want food and gas until we are better financially next pay day. I had some ideas that I wanted to talk to her about for the kids. She does not talk to me; she does what she wants. I wanted to use the credit card for some gifts because we need the cash. I went to take them back, and she gave me the receipts for them. On the way out she said she only wanted the basketball and a shirt for our daughter. I told her to come with me, and we will decide what to buy together. She said she wants nothing to do with me. She is through with me, she said. I said you do what you have to. We argued a little. She went to run to the car, and so did I. When I was leaving the parking garage, she stood in front of me. I started to go slowly, and she would not let go of the door handle. So I slowly started to drive because I did not want to hurt her. I just wanted to go. I stopped in the middle of the street and a red truck pulled next to us. He said if I hurt her he would call the police. I told him it was my car too, and she needed to let go, so I could leave. I told her I would call 911 if she did not. I did not want to be put in jail for this. I believe that I was correct. I did not want this to get anymore out of hand. I did call 911, and she left and went home. I called several times, but she did not answer. I told her lets work this out reasonably. I went and exchanged the gifts and put them on the credit card and kept them even though we are tight for every penny. I brought them home and she was a asleep and told her I have them. The day was better after that but not much.

She says that the money is hers not mine. I told it is our money. We are married. She went on and on about this.

What a rollercoaster day for me.

[sandi2]

Has she ever display crazy behavior like that before?

[LSG]

Hi sandi2,

Not that I can remember. She has become increasingly insensitive, beligerent, and determined that she will get her way. She is really starting to think life is all about her. She has always been a little selfish, but this is going to new height.

Easter was difficult for everyone. It became better as the day went along. She started out making breakfast for the kids and not me. She did even ask if I wanted anything. After breakfast, I cleaned up. I am having a hard time remembering what happened for some reason. I think I am blocking the day out. She watched TV with the kids, and I went to buy drinks for everyone including her. I came home and she got ready. The kids and I played outside for a while, and then we prepared for an Easter egg hunt. The kids were really excited, especially my daughter. My and wife hid the eggs, and then my W fell asleep when it was my daughter't turn. She later said it was from some medicine. I don't believe her. My daughter said, "it was the worst Easter ever for her. I went to pick up some Del Taco while she still slept with the kids. Then we ate and waited an hour before taking the kids to the park. Everyone had fun there. W and I talked and little and played with my D's badminton racquets. It was fun. We came home had dinner. I commented that is was very good, and she replied "I know." I was so irritated by that but I did not say anything about it. I did not want to ruin dinner. We watched a movie together and had a good time. I found all sorts of things. about the OM on the computer which pissed me off, but I stayed quiet.

She has been cleaning more and spending time with the kids. She has kept her work phone off. I think she is trying to look good to divorce me. I don't trust her at all.

Just my wonderful day!!!

[sandi2]

So what is your plan? Are you going to collect information about OM and their contacts or let it go? Did you read the post over in the Infidelity forum about exposure?

The way she is treating you in front of the children (cooking you no breakfast....excluding you in things) is openly disrespecting you and that is very bad. She must show respect for you in front of your kids. Has she been doing this for a long time or just started?

[Steve McQueen]

The money order was lost in the mail for the PI too.

you are really down on your luck, man. Do something about it. If you need advice ,,, go to the bank and put a stop on that money order and have a new one issued. You owe that dude money for the work he has preformed. I am sure he would meet you at the bank to get his cash. You owe yourself the truth.

I found all sorts of things. about the OM on the computer which pissed me off, but I stayed quiet.

interesting. what did you find?

[LSG]

sandie2,

Honestly, I really don't have a plan at this point. I am just trying to get by day by day.

I am still trying to get information on the OM, and so is the PI. I will cancel the Money Order and reissue another one. It takes about 30 days to do and $15 more I do not have. Her next hit to me is direct depositing her check into another account and start paying the bills and give me nothing. She has such contempt for me. I do not know where it comes from. It seems to be almost utter hate.

She has started in the last month or two disrespecting me really bad in front of the kids. It is horrible, and they comment that she is very mean to me. I just hate the weekends for this reason. It only gets worse and worse.

What should be my next step?