I'm back and looking for insight

[flowmom]

Byron Katie has quite a few books and if you google her her site has video clips of her doing The Work with people. She's pretty amazing.

I don't really have many tips for you as I'm pretty early in my sitch...I just sneak into piecing to learn and offer support.

One tip, though, is don't make procrastination a M issue. I have a lot of issues with procrastination and I've done a lot to try to address them...but I still have the problem. Procrastination is not as simple as people think. Everyone procrastinates sometimes, but for people who chronically procrastinate, it's not as simple as a Nike commercial ("just do it").

My H made procrastination into a M issue and he actually told someone it was a "dealbreaker" in the M. Really?? We have shared so much over the years. My procrastination did affect him negatively, but we all have faults.

H turning himself into my taskmaster created a lot of dysfunction in our M. For someone who is dealing with serious procrastination issues, the spouse is not a healthy choice as an accountability partner and I suggest you avoid that role if you want to share trust and closeness with your H.

Yes, it's annoying to have unfinished projects. I guess you have to decide how important those are, and negotiate things like "well if this isn't done by Jan 2011, would you be OK with hiring it out?" -- not in a tough love way, but in a mutual-solution-finding mode.

It's great to read about what you have overcome in your M. It sounds like you've been on quite a journey .