Which brings me back to the answer for this thread: you cannot "fix" something that the other partner does not want to or will not let you fix. Period.
The can only be changed if something or greater risk is brought forward so that "fixing" the original problem becomes preferable.
The Captain
+1
This is why (in my opinion) a good change agent (for an SSM, say a board certified sex therapist) is so helpful in making sure that the person who doesn't want to change understands the full ramifications of what change and not changing really mean. Good luck to you in your journey.
>43 years of marriage--My wife and I are now closer than we have been in decades. I believe that my SSM is over.
