Can you post in this thread some things that have helped you when you've been in your low points?
me: 42 | STBXH: 41 | T: 18 | M: 10 | separation: Jan 3, 2010 | they deserve better: S7 & D4 current thread: http://tinyurl.com/3y8sxcp .: first breathe, then heal, then start LIVING :.
Gnosis, thank you for letting us know that DU is OK.
DU I know that you will talk when you are ready, It's OK. I'm sure that no one expects you to be answering all of these post. Good to know that you are OK and I'm happy to hear that you are doing well.
Love yourself, pamper yourself, do something for YOU today
M53 H54 D17 M33Y T38Y Bomb OW 09/09 OUT 10/09 BACK 11/09 OUT 01/10 WANTS TO R 04/10 BACK with OW 05/10 Wants to Reconcile 05/11 I said NO
Thank you all. I TRULY APPRECIATE the support I have received here on the boards. This is challenging (and I realize it is for all of us). I know you all have been helping me understand the need to detach. It is hard because I didn't realize the impact of my behavior until it was too late and by that time, my H was ready to leave. And has now been gone for over 3 months.
I know I need to GAL and while I try, my mind really is beginning the countdown to his deployment with no indication of progress. I know, once again, I am thinking of him. Please forgive me for my thoughts, but they are what they are.
I am planning to spend the afternoon at a park with my girlfriend, her H, and kids. But after that I plan on coming home, take a long bath and watch a great and hopefully funny movie. Any recommendations?
OLD THREAD-http://tinyurl.com/y98nuty Me 44 H 51 T 15 yrs M 9+ yrs No Kids "You may be deceived if you trust too much, but you will live in torment unless you trust enough."
Glad you have some fun plans for today. Don't apologize for thinking about your H - it is natural, it is normal, and it takes a long time. Getting out with friends is a great place to start, one of the best. The more you are focused on other things (and GOOD things), the more you will be able to put your H out of your mind.
Sorry, no movie recommendations here. I haven't seen a movie in what feels like a hundred years (well, that wasn't for kids anyway).:)
Stay away from romantic comedies - they are really depressing
Did you ever go to movies by yourself? I started doing that, it's actually fun. You get out of the house, get to buy the candy YOU like, have some popcorn....Try it sometimes
M53 H54 D17 M33Y T38Y Bomb OW 09/09 OUT 10/09 BACK 11/09 OUT 01/10 WANTS TO R 04/10 BACK with OW 05/10 Wants to Reconcile 05/11 I said NO
Hi dear. I know that you r doing well. I KNOW that u will continue to stand and have faith. I am praying for you as are many others. The thought about ur H are normal. The DR book has a section about thought stopping, which I think would help. When you begin to think about ur H bring up a BIG STOP sign in ur mind and change ur thought to something positive. How about thinking of a joke or that puppy that you ARE going to pick up.
By the way do u happen to have any good "your mama jokes" (inside jokes folks)? Also have u google what a....dingle.....is
Remember our spouse r "loco in the coco" right now (I bet ur smiling).
God Bless Eric
"The difficulties of Life are intended to make us BETTER,not bitter". "Fear is a prison, where you are the jailer. FREE YOURSELF!" "Life is usually all about how you handle Plan B." - Jack3Beans
I know, once again, I am thinking of him. Please forgive me for my thoughts, but they are what they are.
do not be sorry for having thoughts of someone you love and have loved. of course that is going to happen!!! you just keep doing things that you used to, or are now passionate about. focus on your passions outside of H, and surround yourself with positive people, positive music, positive everything.
I have a friend who has been S for 2 years. Her H is a marine, so I'm sure she has more understanding for your sitch. I emailed her today to see if she had any insight, and on the legal stuff as she is studying in that specific field. But, it is amazing what God has done in her life over the course of these years and how much of a blessing she is, and how God has strengthened her and used her in other peoples lives. She is a true inspiration...and coming from a lady who in the very beginning would call the OW every day and hang up!
(((DU)))
Me 33 H 34 S9 S3 M 6 yrs (2gether 11 yrs) EA/PA 1/2006 DB 5/2006 H wants D 6/2006 H wants ME 8/2006 H "said" PA/EA over 8/2006 H erased OW off phone! 2/2007
"It is far better 2 choose humility & change oneself, than 2 wait in vain trying 2 chang someone else."
All - Again, you are all giving me good advice based on experience. If only I could follow it through. I will continue to try.
It has been a crazy few days, primarily as a result of stress at work and my anxiety. Anyways, I continue to receive sourt summons that are repeats from 2 weeks ago; it appears that my county court is having problems with multiple submissions of summons. I received one at work today and was just outraged and ended up sending a text to my H telling him that I received another one of "his summons". He wrote back that I should not have received anything because he did not initiate any new summons and then said he cancelled the last one.
I responded back that I will work with my L moving forward and he just responded..."wait, stop, please just stop..." He inidated that he is concerned about the costs of going through lawyers for everything. Well, didn't HE create this by running away from everything!!!!
He then texted, "I needed to just get away from our situation and that is why I left". I am not sure what that meant and just responded "....to have a good evening".
I know that you will all say that I need to STOP reacting when I receive something as a result of my H. This MLC is just driving me insane....
Last edited by DestinyUnknown; 04/07/1012:57 AM.
OLD THREAD-http://tinyurl.com/y98nuty Me 44 H 51 T 15 yrs M 9+ yrs No Kids "You may be deceived if you trust too much, but you will live in torment unless you trust enough."