SecondChance, He is attempting to try it one more time so that if he doesn't feel that it's right, he can say that he honestly put forth the effort to try one more time. He wants to look like the good guy here and be a "man", come home and try...
I don't want to validate his decision to leave us... it's too easy for someone in MLC to do. Is this the point? I have heard him say at various times along this journey that he has "tried everything he could think of and it just doesn't work", I don't want to hear it again!!
Originally Posted By: snodderly
SecondChance, ...an emotionally high charged individual that feels he/she needs to have this happen right away before something happens to change the situation.
What does this mean, an emotionally high charged individual?
And what does this mean about something happens to change the situation? Is that because he might have someone else, or because I am pushing sep papers and he doesn't want to pay, or because I appear to be moving on with my life and he wants me to wait, or or or? I know you can't mind read H's motives, but can you elaborate at all based on what I wrote?
Originally Posted By: snodderly
I truly believe that he thinks he is, but honestly...all the talk about France, etc., makes me say.....date him for a while....It's more destructive to you and your family if he comes home and bolts again.
I'm afraid to date him. When he really wants something he goes all out. I see no sign of that. He's saying what I want to hear, but the actions don't support it. If I date him, the kids will know, I am primary custodial parent living in another city with a full-time job. There is no way I can go out without them knowing, and I tried this once before, and they got really worried about me (their Dad left them, Mom's going out with no explanation as to where or why, they got very scared.). He can't drop by easily because he lives in another city. And when he does come by, if I give him access to the house and our lives he crosses all the boundaries. I do want the R back, but it seems so impossible to do without the ugly MLC rearing up again and again, and the past, and the bs.... how does one do this? Maybe I just wait until he feels more committed to coming on board? But if I keep pushing him away he will GAL elsewhere, who wouldn't?
