Do I just go ahead and assume she is leaving and put the house on the market to prepare for the papers to be served some day?
Don't assume anything. Do what you want to do for yourself. Do you want to sell? If not, then don't.
The kids are more affected than they will let on. You know how they are. They have to figure out a way to deal with it. I think the more you can show that you are interested in their personal lives, the more they will respond to you. If you can't get them to say anything, then they may be dealing with depression themselves, or it could be their way of tuning it out. Wish you had a good family therapist.
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
