but I do know that I do need to take some responsibility for my 1/2 of the M..so I do need to listen to his BS and try to understand and validate where necessary. Nothing will ever justify his A...but I would like to understand why/how it happened. Perhaps the communication improvement will help with this??
You may never know why because he doesn't know why. But you're right you do need to look at your part in where this M ended up. I wouldn't focus on the A too much because it's just crazy behavior and a selfish decision on his part.
If he were acting and speaking rationally I would say yes it may help to listen to his side in MC and figure it out. I really think this is a process for YOU to do on YOU. You know where YOUR skeletons are buried you just have to dig them up and get them to talk.
H feels guilty and doesn't want everyone blaming him for M failure. Period. So he's bring you into the game. Now you belong in the game and you should take on some of the responsibility becasue you ARE part of the problem just as I am in my M and everyone else on this board. I just don't think you should let H blame you, he should not be the primary source of your introspection.
My goal is to some day be the person my dog thinks I am
