I went to mine last night and as has happened before, the component of sexual attraction came up. I made it clear that while I am satisfied with my Ws body, there are parts that I find 'ugly'. It sounds awful I would talk that way, but in IC and here I will spill it all as it is.
My IC (who was our MC) reminded me that if I'm satisfied, stay. Otherwise, things won't be better in that area.
She also mentioned another thing. Changing her example to match your H: An IC will respond to things they hear, not to the facts. If your H says, "I feel so alone with my W when we're out", the IC has a lot to ask about your shyness (etc) and how your H can control those feelings. If he said, "I hate being out with her", the IC might think your R is the problem.
If your H's IC isn't getting to the root of problems, it would make things worse. That is why MC can be better - you are in the picture and the converstations can lead to a better understanding of your dynamics. My IC was my MC, so she is aware of my W and our married issues.
