Not sure if you, cat04 were calling me a bonehead, but I'll let that pass. Again that reference was to my mother-in-law, but I digress.
No, I do not blame my mil for running in the middle of the night. I just wish she had done it sooner! However, this does show me that even when a person does what is best at the time, it does have lasting consequences on children.
Yes, I have been a yeller, but since the bomb drop have learned to change that. My husband and I both came from families that yelled. So, yes, I accept my blame for what I possibly did to him, but I also think his childhood did some horrible damage to him.
Thank you for your comments on being a Christian. I guess I never really even thought about it that way, that someone in MLC can not be held to even the standards and beliefs they once held before the crisis. And, since you said that, I do remember him telling me he can't hear from God right now. That he is reading his Bible and is still confused. I never put 2 and 2 together that this was MLC talking.
And, as an LBS I have made some horrible mistakes. I have read almost all of the threads in resources and can't believe that even though I knew it was wrong, I still found myself pursuing him, asking to see him, etc. It wasn't until last week that I finally got it through my head to leave him alone! And, I have no idea if I have done permanent damage and pushed him away for good. I pray not. I don't think so, since he still seems to find a reason to contact me....usually about fixing things in the house.
And, yes I know there are no guarantees here. And I find that incredibly sad for all of us.
