Don't get me wrong, there are times where I did feel that she had DISRESPECTED me and I let that be known. Such as her down playing the EA and does not believe it to be WRONG that she shared our business with a co-work who is a male. I let her know how I felt about that.
I need to choose my battles wisely. Arguing about the way she feels or the fact she contradicts herself will only lead to more problems. I am then seen as controlling or jerk. In the past I would have left her stuff on the doorstep (and I had before). In the past I would had spoke over her and shut her feelings out completely (which lead to this and the EA). I don't see it as a pattern but more of repeat of what I did to her. A taste of my own medicine. For it to be a pattern would suggest that I would once again repeat my same old terrible behavior. If I maintain a positive energy hopefully it rubs off on her and her spirits start to rise. She is in a state of depression and wont seek professional help, I can't combat depression and reconcile a marriage with negativity.
Also from what I read on many threads some/most of this is "wayward script" and if I give into it than I defeat the purpose of my DBing efforts. This is how I feel but if you can convince me to see it in a different light, I am all for it "whatever works."
I think your position here is very well put OIN. I am on side 100% here.
