If boundaries don't work for MLC, why are we encouraged to set them? Is it for me?
You got it..boundaries are for YOU, not them....there are certain times when boundaries are necessary; especially in the case of OW/OM, and exposure to your children. Like a child who pushes the limits, limits in that case do need to be set.
If your husband decides to go on with OW, because you set a limit in that area, his loss, not yours.
Just as he is being the opposite of his natural self, so are you.
Hope this helps.
If he'd kept her away from your house and respected your boundary, that was one thing..but if you allow him to get away with it once, he'll do it again.
This is one time that his behavior was/is not acceptable, and you'd stated clearly you did NOT want him to bring her there to your house..and he violated that rule; not keeping his crap away from you.
Remember, as each person is different, every MLC/Transition is different..what works for one may not work for another. Most of the time it is trial and error for ALL involved.
