OTM, i do feel a lot of failure. i know this is not my fault or his fault anyway, but i certainly feel like i've failed at keeping a marriage together...we haven't even been married 2 and a half years yet!! i'm also feeling an enormous sense of loss right now, over the future plans we had, the family i wanted with him...compounded with the extreme aching of missing him, his presence, our daily lives together. it all adds up to just about the most painful hurt i've ever experienced in my life.

i try to let my rational brain in on this from time to time, and remember there were so many things that didn't work, so many things that made me unhappy...my H has accepted that while we love and care about each other, we just can't make it work. i'm not there yet, but i am certainly not glorifying our relationship or forgetting all the hard times and hurt we went through.

Me30 H29
M2.5 T5
H moved out 1/23/2010
H wants signed agreement 3/30/2010
...feeling hopeless