Yes, Saffie, totally agree on that. Can't you hear the desperation in my voice? LOL - that's why I'm so worked up about this. I do need to fix this ASAP. I guess now is a great time to do it as he's going to be confused and thrown off his game by what happened last night. He's not going to know why he did that or how it happened, and second guessing himself, so now's a great time.
Oh, I know all of that, Mr Bond. But, whether he uses me or not, the chemicals are still there and I was using those, in a way. Again, don't want to sound cold, but last time they worked in my favor, and this time I was doing the same. And the crying was a big breakthrough because now I can ask him what he's so scared of.
As I said, he went back to being cold. Maybe not cold, but when he got back from the bathroom, he turned his back to me and kept sighing. I asked if he wanted to talk and he said "probably not the best time to talk." He's confused and totally thrown off of his game. I expect a huge down today on the roller coaster. He did still allow his back to touch me, so not totally back to being distant, but not holding me either. Hoping this doesn't push him faster but rather puts a doubt in his mind. H is very emotional right now and is a romantic, so the fact that it happened at all, alcohol-induced or not, is going to throw a wrench into his neat little world of I'm out and she's in.
