Pass, I think you are putting WAY TOO MUCH emphasis on Retro right now.
Your H has some serious problems... Retro is NOT the place to deal with alcoholism or infidelity...
He needs to be sat down with his family around him and he needs to be told to make a committment to stop the cheating and stop the drinking OR he will be CUT OUT of EVERYONE's lives. Retro is NOT giong to do that for you... It's not designed to.
Do you HAVE a family therapist that you see regularly? This sort of work really should be handled by a professional family therapist, not be Retro.
