Those are really strong, helpful realizations that you've had--good on you.
Of course you're annoyed by the superficiality of your interactions--I certainly remember what that felt like. However, that's the most depth he's able to give your relationship right now, and in order to get to a place where (perhaps) you'll be able to interact in a more honest and meaningful manner, he'll have to grow and make the same kinds of realizations you're making now. He literally will not hear you if you try to "clear the air" because he's brainwashed himself into another reality. I'd suggest, if you want to "speak" your truth, write it all down, and put away the paper. You'll feel better for getting it all out, and you'll likely feel differently about it anyhow once you've grown and processed further.
The snowshoeing sounds like fun. I wouldn't worry too much about the "mystery" involved in snowshoeing, as it wouldn't be a very threatening sort of date....
