I'm also worried about pressure I am getting from friends n family to divide up the money BEFORE the birth. Everyone says those first few months of childrearing (less than 2 months away..) are so intense and I will have even LESS headspace than I do now for things as important as this.
But today I just don't feel capable of having this conversation with him, let alone any conversation. It's too heavy, and I am in protection phase. Ending our joint finances is a brutal sign that our M really is about to be over.. I have to tell you guys, it scares the wits out of me.
I could get a L to do it for me, but it seems so harsh. A mediator - such as a trusted family member - might be better at negotiating on my behalf. I just know that right now, I would fall to pieces if I had to do it myself directly with H.
I know that if I don't take this step, I am enabling H's bad choices, the destruction of our family through his cutting and running and his affair. I also have to think about protecting my half of the money for me and the baby. As it is, this separation combined with H's recent unemployment is really hurting us financially.
I know who is in the wrong.
How do I find the strength to take this next step & should I follow the advice and the schedule suggested by family and friends?
