If you Google social networking I think you should find it. Or Google for a list of the most popular websites and then it may pop out at you. Might be staring you right in the "face". KWIM?
Not sure if we all have to be so secret code word like. I think I read that Sara was booted for sharing personal info though....
M38, H37 S3, S7 Together 15 yrs Married 8 yrs Bomb July 2008 Inhouse separation "I hate you" "We are over" (too many times to count) Reconciled Sept 2009 (still worth it)
Thanks for the third party suggestion, unfortunately it's to late. He trapped me in a convo tonight. He said he was very concerned about having me come back in the home and taken on the responsibilities and having another breakdown. He claimed to be worried about the kids, blah blah. And he threatened me, that if I didn’t agree to at least a month of no breakdown before I move back in, he would file for emergency custody of the kids due to my OD. And before he would let me move into the house, he wanted the divorce papers signed. The nerve of this man!!!! Needless to say, I did break down and cried in front of him. I did tell him that these were his choices to not be married and be a part time dad. Anyway, I said a lot of sh&^ I shouldn’t have.
Fortunately my therapy appt was right after this. And he is a good family therapist. He helped me to calm down. And he thinks my H is threatening me because he wants the D as soon as possible, and that he is not worried about me or the kids. He also pointed out, just like all of you have, that the only chance of us ever getting back together is for me to be happy with myself. And he said he is going to help me that.
With all that said, I don’t think I do want my H back. If the man I married ever comes back maybe, but for now, I’m going ahead with the divorce for myself and my kids.
Together 16 years Married 12 years Me 36 H 34 D9 & S6 Separated 12/3/09 Confirmed A 1/25/10 Exposed A 1/26/10 H hired L, but not filed yet 1/27/10
Wow!!! You do not let this man intimidate you!!!! Get legal advice NOW! Yeah, I am sure the judge would think he is the @ss for cheating you. I do not think he threat holds any merit.
He is threatening you- so very, very unacceptable.
Worried about the kids? That is him just spinninghis tales again. If he was worried about the kids he would end his affair.
DO NOT CAVE INTO THIS MAN NOW. IF you do it will be a huge mistake. If the lawyer states that your hubby can not file for temporary sole custody. Then move in tomorrow!!!!! OR ASAP.
AND DO NOT BE BULLIED INTO SIGNING THE D PAPERWORK! I would also let his family know of his behavior.
But most important!!! You are still giving away your power!!!!!!!!! Refuse ALL conversation with him. Walk away and got to the bathroom and lock the door. Anything. Do not let him talk to you. Or simply validate. Do the have a 2 way conversation. Let the man have a soliloquy if need be.
As soon as you allow a 2 way conversation to occur he has his hooks in you.
M38, H37 S3, S7 Together 15 yrs Married 8 yrs Bomb July 2008 Inhouse separation "I hate you" "We are over" (too many times to count) Reconciled Sept 2009 (still worth it)
At this point I have to agree with you. But take him for all he's got. His behavior has been truly despicable. I mean so very awful!
Let him and the OW rot together.
He obviously... I don't know what to say. How can you explain absolute disgust in a person!
Last edited by june72; 03/31/1011:47 AM.
M38, H37 S3, S7 Together 15 yrs Married 8 yrs Bomb July 2008 Inhouse separation "I hate you" "We are over" (too many times to count) Reconciled Sept 2009 (still worth it)
I have talked to a couple lawyers, and they do say it's very possible that he will get tempary custody of the kids for what I did, with the OD. My therpist and lawyers suggested I play his game for a month like he has asked, so I can get back in the house with the kids. That is what I'm going to do, and than I will sign D papers, so that he will no longer have a say with custody or the house.
He has gone to far. An affair I could forgive, but threating me with my kids I can not.
Together 16 years Married 12 years Me 36 H 34 D9 & S6 Separated 12/3/09 Confirmed A 1/25/10 Exposed A 1/26/10 H hired L, but not filed yet 1/27/10
this latest thing with your husband has NOTHING to do with you! It has EVERYTHING to do with him trying to make his life comfortable. Don't think for a minute that your attempted OD or anything you have said has anything to do with his threats. I can GUARANTEE that even if you NEVER attempted to OD and just happened to say you needed a break from everything and then left to stay with your friend while your husband stayed at the house that he would have STILL been making these same threats.
Your husband put himself in an uncomfortable position by having an affair and then staying at his mother's house. As soon as he got a taste of staying back at your house he got comfortable again and now doesn't want to go back to living at his mother's house or having to pay for rent to get his own apartment. He was going to THREATEN, PROTEST, or somehow push back on you coming back to the house REGARDLESS of what you did. I just don't want you to fall for any of his REASONINGS.
I think you are smart to play his game for a month. I always remember this scripture..."what the devil meant for bad, God meant for good." Even if you are not into religion, it is still true. When someone does something out of spite or with not good intentions, it always comes back to them. So if your husband is making these threats without good intentions of actually having the children's interest at heart, then it will come back to him. It is happening with my husband RIGHT now!!!
Me: 28 H: 32 1st marriage 4 both 1 1/2 year married 2gether for 9 1S: 6months 1stepson: 2yo
Can you please get that in writing that after one month you can move back to the house or involve the lawyers?
I do not trust this man at all at the moment.
I mean we are talking about losing your home and more importantly kids here...
I am seriously alarmed. Please get this legally documented or some sore of written documentation. Some other person who will witness to this.
The man you know is gone at the time being- do not trust this new person. He is all about himself and will throw you under the bus, sad to say.
Reading about this is really upsetting!
M38, H37 S3, S7 Together 15 yrs Married 8 yrs Bomb July 2008 Inhouse separation "I hate you" "We are over" (too many times to count) Reconciled Sept 2009 (still worth it)
A million virtual hugs and thoughts going out your way.
Stay strong-your kids really need you.
M38, H37 S3, S7 Together 15 yrs Married 8 yrs Bomb July 2008 Inhouse separation "I hate you" "We are over" (too many times to count) Reconciled Sept 2009 (still worth it)
4luv, thank you that means a lot to me. I know no matter what I say to him, he is going to act this way. I'm finally ready to move on with the D. He has gone to far in my opionion, and I know one day he will regret all of this. If the man I married ever comes back, and I'm not already with someone else, then maybe. But I'm no longer going to think like that, I'm going forward like we will never be together again. Like my therapist told me last night, I deserve to have someone want to be with me.
Together 16 years Married 12 years Me 36 H 34 D9 & S6 Separated 12/3/09 Confirmed A 1/25/10 Exposed A 1/26/10 H hired L, but not filed yet 1/27/10
