.....I agree. I need to grow up and get over it, but that is sooooo hard. Why couldn't she get over what ever needed to be done to have intimacy with me all those years ago, and now still reject me?
One of the beautiful aspects of working on Getting a Life is that you focus your energies on something else and get emotionally involved in GAL. Then you demonstrate to both yourself and your wife that you are capable of making huge and dramtic changes. Hopefully some of the things that you do differently are things that your spouse finds interesting/attractive and will draw them to you.
One of my GAL activities has been getting in shape to run a half marathon. My wife and I have been talking walks together and she loves the time together and the talking, while we walk. She has also signed up to go on an organized 5-mile run with me, where our kids are running a half-marathon. So that part of my GAL has caused both my wife and family to pull together. My wife recently was on a work trip that involved quite a bit of walking and she was proud telling me about how much better shape she was in.
There is a thread by on the stages/phases of SSM cure, which is posted on the top of the SSM forum. It has some very good advice. You need to figure out how to forgive your wife and accept some responsiblity for some of the problems between the two of you. Again, figure out how to forgive her.
Good Luck
>43 years of marriage--My wife and I are now closer than we have been in decades. I believe that my SSM is over.
