MLC, H and me

[courageous wife]

Hi guys...thanks for stopping by and the encouraging words! SC-our sitch's do sound similiar...I am sorry you are going thru this too but sounds like you have settled in your new place well. My L told me that eveytime she and I visit that it will get easier for me so glad to see that it did for you too!

FM-I am strong today...hoping to remain that way...I am actually ok with renting as I don't want to have to do the maintenance stuff on a house, at least, not while there is so much else to do with raising kids, working etc.!!!

Tom-you will get there. The hardest thing for us is that we "thought" all was well in our marraiges and that we could always count on our spouse...

So everyone! I came home today as I had a break in my work schedule to tell you that I had gotten a phone call from a friend telling me that she had seen my in town H driving the hot rod...she also said that OW was driving the our truck. SO.....the ONE boundary that I have set through this whole thing since H left was to not bring HER here again and what did he do? I simmered for a little while and thought I should do the 24-48hr rule and calm down but then I decided that if it was one of my kids that had done this, that I would have to deal it with it right away. I had just asked my L about the truck and how I should handle it as it is rightly mine, inherited from my Dad and she said I could just ask for it or she would send a letter ask him to bring it back...I told her that there was not any hurry. So, after calming down and thinking about it, I called my L, told her what happened and she promplty told me she would call his L and tell her that he needs to hand it over to me.

Now, I know this is going to piss him off big time and he will probably throw a fit and start taking some of his "prized" possessions but that is ok. I will not let that bother me. I think that this is what I needed...to get PISSED off. In the beginning he told me that he didn't want us to hate each other and at the time I couldn't imagine why HE would hate ME because HE was the one doing this to me and our family. I am beginning to understand. I still love him but I think I am FINALLY realizing how far gone his is and the reason everyone on these boards tell you to set these boundaries. So, he broke his promise to not bring her here and now he will see what the consequence is...now, how to handle this with the kids!!!

I have to add that I really think that this will help me with detaching...ha ha!