That's a really good list. I don't really disagree with any of it, but I think you could cover just about ALL of it with:
"I'm so sorry to tell you this, but he's lying to you. He's been lying to ALL of us. I wouldn't tell you that if I didn't have proof, and I really don't want to put you in the middle of it all, but trust me when I say he's lying to you. I hope I can count on you to support our marriage in any way you can."
