how do i keep my hope alive?

[trytryagain]

my H is planning to come to my apartment tomorrow to talk. i'im not really sure what to say, and i get the feeling he wants to talk about signing our separation agreement and moving on. i don't know if his IC is helping or hurting him in terms of how he sees our M, but it does seem to me that he's pretty confused about what he wants and has said that he feels overwhelmed with failure.

i am open to the idea of going to a MC and at least seeing if we can make our M work. he suggested seeing an MC a few weeks ago but now seems hesitant and wants to move on with our lives. that makes no sense to me so i'm at a loss at to how to deal with meeting up to talk tomorrow. we have been meeting in restaurants over drinks or for dinner, but it's hard to express your feelings when you're trying not to cry in front of a bunch of strangers, so we decided to meet at my apartment instead.

i do love my H completely and accept him as he is. there are things about his behavior that would need to change (like the weed every day and spending SO MUCH time with his guy friends when i'm home alone)in order for our M to heal and to work. but again, we're not there yet. now he's telling me he doubts the viability of our marriage...i don't know if telling him that i accept him for his faults will make much of a difference to him now.