O'dog's Act II

[orangedog]

Riding?

I've been riding outside a lot this winter. Hardtail Cannondale with studded Nokian tires ($70 each from REI). Mid-season I got a set of wide SnowCat rims ($250). I like the extra wide footprint and "suspension" these rims create so much that I'm planning to run 'em year round.

Suspension parts don't work as well in the cold so I'm running a rigid fork. I have a short-travel Manitou fork that I'm going to switch back to late in the spring. It's old but lighter than a lot of stuff out there now.

Anyway this setup works great on packed trails, ice, and pavement. I can't go thru the deep unpacked stuff like the Fatbacks, 9:Zero:7's, and Pugsleys but on the other hand I didn't have to buy another bike; just a wheel change.

Last bits. I gave up on winter shoe covers over bike shoes with clipless pedals; Merrell Wintermocs with toe clips are warmer for me. Water bottles freeze; a Camelbak under a layer will stay unfrozen longer. Caloric intake increases in cold weather.

Get out there!! Don't make it about the mileage, just make it about the experience.

[Gardener]

O'D, You're sounding good, lately. Good to hear. Some thoughts on your recent excellent points:

- I'm never going back. There is really only one thing I ever desire credit for again and that's a mortgage on a small house or condo. Amen.

- I will need time to repair. Patience. Amen.

- The Dog has always hated money. Hated dealing with it. Being defined by it. I will work with it and keep it in it's place. Gardener, too. Big time. Sometimes paralyzingly so. Never again.

- Our grandparents had it right. Live simple. Pay cash or go without. Be happy with what you have. Yep. The old adage -"use it up, wear it out, make it do, or do without." Also, "want what you have instead of having what you want."

The Dog is disenfranchised with so many things lately. Spending, economy, jobs, education, housing, etc. I feel like I (we) were sold a bill of goods.

So does Gardener.

It's not for lack of personal optimism (macro optimism is another story). I just feel the things valued, conventional wisdom, and the common model was (is) flawed.

More and more, I reflect on having lived my life "by the book". I now plan on living it by my book during the next chapter. After the house is sold, I plan on downsizing and "de-stuffifying" big time.

Won't get fooled again.

Peace,

[orangedog]

Gardner, the "by the book" thing is exactly how I feel. Time to start writing my own story.

[Gardener]

In the four agreements, Don Miguel Ruiz refers to this - rather eloquently - as our "domestication".

[orangedog]

The blank page is too big so the short story is that I had a good weekend with the kids.

[Gardener]

Good. So, I guess that is "the long and the short of it."

Good for you.

[orangedog]

One year anniversary of the bomb. Not as big of a day as I thought it would be.

Yesterday rode outside for a few hours.

Today hiked a local peak and skiied down.

Session with psy. Not as traumatic as last time but good.

Lots of thoughts and insights but I don't have it in me to write today.

[antlers]

Hey dog.

I admire you for the perseverence you've shown throughout all of this. I'm sorry it happened.

You are stronger than you might sometimes feel. You've been through one of life's most traumatic events...and now you're emerging from it.

Riding, hiking, skiing...good for you.

FWIW, I think your ex gave up on something that would have gotten much better had she made the decision to stay in there and work at it. Barring any unforseen circumstances I think someone else will see the good in you and want it for themselves. Patience, coupled with 'the work' will bring it about. Have a good day buddy.

[antlers]

Hey dog,

just checking on you. Where ya' been? Hope everything is well with you.

[orangedog]

Thanks,

Doing fine. I don't stop by here very much anymore other than to take a peek at the boards once in a while. I really just needed to get away from conversation about divorce.

I have some occasional contact with the former mostly related to kid stuff, otherwise I really don't concern myself. Kids seem to be doing fine.

I spend more time with friends and seem to have a richer web of relationships. I used to worry about how I was perceived to the point that it interfered with my life and kept me inside a lot. Somehow I let it go.

I'm not really dating or looking. I hang out. Meet people. Do things. Sometimes I miss having someone close in my life to share (I do have one special friend), however I don't miss living with someone.

The Black Dog hasn't been by too much. I have my moments but seem to be at a permanently lower level of stress. I don't know if or when that mangy hound will stop by again for a major round but it's always a possibility.

I dropped a few activities that just weren't doing it for me (Tri club). Instead I've been doing a lot of other activities (winter biking, skiing) instead of pointlessly logging miles out of guilt. I'm more interested in experiences.