After reading your post a couple of times, I guess it is plain to see I do still have a relatively strong attachment. We have no communication except through solicitors, she does not want anything to do with me, and yet I still feel a pull towards her.
The only time she decided to contact me recently was to berate me for something that was totally avoidable on her part. Just an excuse to beat me with. I ignored her texts as initiating contact would have resulted in mindless arguing.
The thing I find difficult is to 'detach' somebody that was with me for fifteen years, bore two children with me, the 'family'routine that we had, and all the peripheral stuff including friendships with couples that have now gone because of the impending D - basically the life I had.
I work, I work out and try to live my life as best I can. I miss my kids, my old life, though I know it will never return. I ask myself the same question every day - "Would I take her back"?
After having an affair and not showing me a thread of respect I keep telling myself it should be no. Trouble is, a part of me would take her back, but I believe it is because I have not been on a date since the bomb in December 2008 and I feel quite lonely at times.
I compare her to other girls and to me none of them seem to be as lovely as my W was. I am putting her on a pedistle that she does not deserve, yet I find it incredibly difficult to remove her from my thoughts.
Any views?
Last edited by markhaving probs; 03/29/1001:36 PM.
Bomb dropped: 19/12/08 Me:48 WAW:41 D:10 S:6 Married: 15 years