I don't think it's a dealbreaker one way or the other, Frace. But yes, I would try to avoid it. You can tell your wife (and her family) "We will talk soon; I'm just not ready yet."
If it takes more than a week for you to get in touch with OM's W, then you're going to have to meet with your wife at some point, just to hear her out. You probably won't be able to believe a word that comes out of her mouth, but your shared history together earns her at least that much at this stage.
