Eye of the storm?

[cyclone]

Please keep reminding me to keep my expectations low.

As I wrote before, W left Friday night and didn't spend the night in the house. S7 had a ballgame on Saturday and she told him she would be at his game. I spent Saturday morning doing things for me and the kids.

About 15 min before we had to leave for the game W comes home. We all got in the car and headed out to the game. She sat by me the whole time. Just a week ago she would avoid being anywhere near me at practice. We talked throughout the game about little things. She asked about any plans that I had made for the kids spring break. I told I wanted to take them camping and she said that sounded like a great idea and wants to join us. We're going for two nights next weekend.

Sundays she leaves to go to a dance thing with a picnic afterwards. This is where she hangs out with her new friends (including OM). She left but called later to say that she didn't go to the dance but was disappointed that she didn't go because she really enjoys it. She said she was going to take a walk and go to a clothing exchange party. She let me know she wouldn't be home tonight but would be back to pick the kids up from school tomorrow.

All told there were many more positive steps than negative ones this weekend. I am working like crazy to not fall into a place were I feel like things are going back to the way they were. I don't want to do anything that she will take as pressure. I know she has to work on her stuff on her own. At the same time one of the things that she told me early on was that I didn't show her that I loved her and she felt abandoned. It is something that I know I need to work on.

Growing up I didn't have a role model of displays of affection and my W needs this from me. I see now that i've never really initiated that sort of affection, I've just responded to it. I want to work on changing that but feel that it is still too soon and would be too much pressure. I have been taking more opportunities for casual touches. I think that is all I can give right now. It is so hard to restrain myself.

I have hope that she is starting to distance herself from OM but i don't talk about any of that an have no way of knowing. She did say thatvshe purposle left her phone at the house during the game on Saturday. That thing has been attached to her person like some bionic appendage. Baby steps.

Time is on my side. Yes it is.