I also don't like how IC seems to help "explain" freedom of choice away to make clients feel better about bad choices. Your H chose infidelity. He could have chosen counseling or any other option. His mother did not make him have an affair. Nor did you. Nor did his "loneliness" or "unresolved issues."His predisposition to something does not create destiny. It is not his mother issues, it's his lack of conscience and self control. Those are his to own and fix. If I were you, I'd want to hear that come out of his mouth instead of blaming and explaining away, even if the IC led him to the "issues" explanation to help with his guilt. You're doing a good job of validating. I would want to be careful not to help EXCUSE. If he winds up blaming his mother for his bad actions, he'll just blame you in the future and possibly use all of the above as justification for future OW.
