My H was furious at first... which lasted a few days. I got accused of being "reckless" because our kids' friends might see that he is in another room and then people might find out what is going on. I just looked at him and said, "you think I am the one being reckless?" He didn't say much after that. He did try the victim role after that for a bit, but soon just accepted it.
I wasn't doing LRT so I still had quite a bit of interaction with H. I made a point of being cheerful but distant. I did my own thing, focused on the kids and tried to work on GAL and 180's. I set boundaries, but more with actions than words (eg. all the lights out, doors locked when H out late, stopped doing things for him I used to do, never contacted him unless I had to, stopped inviting him along when doing fun things with kids etc.)
I was an emotional wreck, devestated by what was going on... but I did not let that show to H. I counted on the support here to help me through that.
The point is to do things differently than what you were doing... it obviously wasn't working.
These things are counter-intuitive, but your best chance of turning things around. If you are like most of us here, you will find a strength within yourself you didn't even know you had.
