Looking for help with WAW

[mza8]

Thanks Sandi. Just checking in today. I'm having a good weekend so far. Getting ready to go to the gym for some exercise. I also play soccer at the same gym a couple nights a week. My W was there Thursday but I didn't go to that side of the gym to say hello. I was proud of myself for showing self control. Makes me think the cognitive behavior techniques my counselor is teaching me are working. I could have looked for a reason to say hello to her but I didn't. Again, don't want to pressure her.

One thing I have been thinking of lately is when/if my W and I begin to work on our M, how do we get past the awkwardness? Strange to say that there would be awkwardness with the woman I have been with for 19 years but I'm sure it will happen. Gr8 day 2B alive said something in his thread that caught my attention. He said that it took the WAW a lot of courage to leave and will take even more courage to come back. How do they get that courage to come back and try? Just a couple of questions that I've given some thought to lately. I even think that when/if my W and I get back together, how do we go back to sharing our lives together again? Sleeping in the same bed again? I wonder if my W will feel uncomfortable if I touch her? I guess maybe these things are just stuff that we work on. This is where I think MC will be so helpful when/if the times comes. I'm not sure that it will be so awkward for me but I would imagine it might be for my W.

I decided not to call my W this weekend. The things we need to discuss can wait until Monday...nothing earth shattering that needs to be discussed this weekend so I want to leave her alone and also make time for me. I don't want her to think I'm ignoring her but I'm also trying not to be so available to her.