Went to collect my things. W wasn't there. Have to come back later.
Exposed to sister. She's in denial. She thinks since my W and her had to go through splitting parents over affairs, she'd never do anything like that but trusts me I wouldn't lie about something as serious as this. Also she knows OM from the past to even consider that, shocks her. She wished me well, in the end and asked me to take care of myself.
Again, very supportive. Won't treat him as a friend, though. She is her sister.
Exposed to cousin. Supportive but won't trust him. Didn't share details.
Will go back to the lioness den, later today. First, to the movies. Hell, yeah.
Last edited by Fracesc; 03/27/1010:53 AM.
Separated: March 1 * Affair discovered: 20-March * Exposed: 27 March * Def. separation: May 1st *
I'm wondering just how much self-righteousness and "outrage" will be exhibited by your Mrs.
Very interested in this, Kimmie.
Over the phone, she tried to act as if she didn't know what was I talking about. Then, I told her "Stop. Don't even bother lying. I know" She kept quiet for the rest of the call.
But surely by know, she'll be outraged that I read her emails (she only suspects this), contacted her family, took the money, etc At least that's what I'm expecting her to throw my way.
Anywho, I won't have a conversation with her or apologise, that's definite.
But I'd like to understand how you guys have dealt with these things: Privacy ( I feel a bit guilty of going through my wife's emails), also there's this thing about if it should be ME letting OM W about the affair, etc
Right now, the only way I've come to terms with this is that I've done all of this for the right reasons. Not to deceive anyone. Unlike my W and OM.
But interested to know how you guys have dealt with this.
Separated: March 1 * Affair discovered: 20-March * Exposed: 27 March * Def. separation: May 1st *
First of all, no need to address privacy with HER, as you're not going to reveal your sources. For YOU, I would tell you that there's a difference between PRIVACY, and SECRETS.
For HER, your answers are simple: "Everything I've done, has been to fight for our marriage.". And "I decided that she had a right to know the truth," and "I decided that I'm not willing to lie to cover up your affair. "
DO NOT FEEL GUILTY!! You had to investigate to protect yourself. Would you blame the local constabulary for investigating a crime? Your w has betrayed you and she has absolutely no right to feel anything but ashamed.
Keep your head in the game. Your moves, so far, have been nothing short of brilliant!
You an expect a series of follow up calls... so she's followed the sweet route for now. I.e. sweet and defensive and "poor little me"
When that doesn't work the anger and spew will follow.
You sit tight.
Yes, after her ridiculous lies and manipulations don't work, she will fly into a rage. Do not get defensive and wordy. Repeat the mantras Puppy has given you, nothing more.
You can do this. Stand like the buffalo in the gale force winds.