Quote: I said "would you like to go with me"..he said he would think about it and let me know..well I asked him last night and he said he really had too much to do at church..so I just said"ok..<snip>..so I am glad that he said truthfully no, then to just go as he would have in the past..so another positive.
Its a positive in another way too. In past posts, you've question H's motive for sitting next to you ... spending time with you ... as to was he doing so because he felt obligated or because he really wanted to? Well, now you know if he does want to he will say no. That means when does sit by you, etc, its because he wants to!
Sue, you know I side on letting your H know how you feel about him and your M. Its not pursuit as you haven't told in a year's time and because of your silence he may be mindreading that you may not really have an interest in staying M either and therefore lead him to the conclusion that its time to consider moving on the legal stuff.
I get a sense he is of the mind that the "flame" has fizzled out for the both of you and there's no sense in trying to fight to get it back within himself if he believes its not there within you for him. So he's not going to be willing to "piece" until you convince him how you feel about him.
If this theory is right, then he needs to know how you feel. One way to lead into it would be to ask directly of H about what is his preception about how you feel towards him and your M. This could be the breakthru you need if there is going to be a chance. If he really want to move on the legal stuff than there really isn't anything here to lose by getting this all out in the open, but if he is drawing conclusions based on improper assumptions about how you feel towards him, then there is so much to gained by clearing the air.
Give it some thought Sue. Who knows ... maybe this is what he means by don't be in a hurry to think it over.
... and thanks for all your gracious support. It does mean a world to me. To be honest, its been your persistent presence on my thread lately that has kept me posting there.
We have been thru alot together ... haven't we? ... and yet we are both holding out for some hope that our futures can still include those we hold dear to our hearts. I guess that's why we can relate to each other so.
