Looking for help with WAW

[gr8 day 2B alive]

mza8,

I took my lunch hour to read your sitch. I have noticed a few similarities with my sitch. Most folks here are dealing with cheating spouses. It appears you and me are alike in that we just have WAW. It doesn't make our work any easier though.

I noticed you keep thinking that if your W would just go to MC with you things would be OK. I would stop obsessing on that point. If and when she is ready let her be the one to decide.

I told my W if she would like to go to MC, she could pick the MC.
This way it is up to her to contact me when SHE makes the appointment.

I was struggling with anxiety for the past 5-7 years and it really destroyed my R. I handled it poorly also. My sleep patterns were a mess. I would drink a pot of coffee in the morning to get going then at night I would have a few beers to "relax". This only added problems, I was tense all the time.

Now that I switched to decaf coffee and drinking herbal teas at night, my sleep has been so much better.

Also in GALing, I am taking yoga and that helps even more.

Try to stop mind reading, it only works you up. Once you cen get to accepting either outcome of your R, you will be in a better place.

Go out with friends to take you mind off of things.

Sounds like you have that planned for the weekend so enjoy.

Do things for you now. Your happiness is the key for her see things are changing.
This is a very humbling experience. Be a happy generous person with everyone you meet.
She will find out through the grapevine that you are OK.

And don't think that if she sees you happy that it will make her say "I guess he's seems OK with the D".
Think - She will want to be with me b/c I am a happy person.
No one want to be around someone who is miserable.
good luck and stay focus.