I have been through alot of ups and downs with my H over the past six weeks. He began spewing at the kids who have cut H off due to his behaviour and the continual hurt. The spewing initially started in response to my daughter17 telling him to leave her alone. He had been trying more than usual to get her to text him. (she hasn't spoken to him since he left as OW was one of her frineds) The texts had been increasing. Out of the blue I got a text the next day saying 'Hi I think we need to talk about divorce' This is the first time this has ever been mentioned. I ignored the text after reading the advice on DB, saying how they just don't know what they are saying half the time. I heard nothing for 6 days. My daughter then was talking to MIL and the spewing started in response to something she had said. (agian by text) It was nothing to get upset about and was just a normal conversation. In his text he said 'I take it you won't be coming to my funeral' She ignored this but as you can imagine she was very upset. The next day is when I got the text saying 'I am very upset by the hurtful things D is saying, if she carries on I may as well not pay anything towards her.' The texts are worded very much like he is having a tantrum all the time.
This contact via text comes after 4 weeks of Withdrawal. His health is suffering, he is in debt, has no money, working two jobs,and from what I am told is very depressed. He has gone backwards it seems to me, but as you have said before, they are all over the place. Previously he had been texting me during the day from work. The texts where lighthearted. Asking questions about the kids, home etc. He was in contact with my family again. But throughout all this OW is still definitely in the picture. He is spending all of his time with people in the 19-25 age range. These are his 'new' friends. He is 46.
On Sunday H text S saying 'As you are not talking to me then I am going to say Goodbye for good' He then went on to say 'I know I have hurt you, I am sorry' This is the first time he has said sorry or that he has hurt the kids? Do you think this is the fog lifting, or just touch and go's.
I have been going through this for nearly 2 years now. Surely He has to be coming to the end soon.
Sorry if this seems all over the place but his moods seem so erratic recently. Like they were at the beginning.