Sorry that you are in the same cruddy situation. I may sound calm and I suppose I appear outwardly so, but I am seething and hurting like crazy inside. Part of the appearing calm part is just who I am, I have always been a worrier, but realize that if I freak out then that is one less calm adult to work with the situation. Yes, I want to go cry in a corner, but if our business fails because I didn't pull myself together then I will feel even worse.
It may help you to think that 'at least I have the business'. Poor compensation for an adulterous husband, but at least its something.
I don't know if I'm better off having my husband at home. I have wrestled with throwing him out, but I guess I was following the advice on the MLC boards to not push them out if they are still waffling. I suppose the still being with me most of the time gave me hope. It is dwindling now as he becomes more and more insistant on pushing for some sort of paperwork or arrangement. I think if things get that far then I will tell him to move out.
I also think that if it comes to divorce I would not work with my husband. There is no way I could see him all day and then watch him go off to some other woman. If it meant selling our business it would hurt alot, but less than working with him. With our arrangement the clients basically come to see me, my husband manages the office. When we met, he did medical office management, so it seemed natural for us to work together. If he leaves, I'll have to hire another office manager, or do things myself for a while. You probably have a different arrangement.
If your husband is not at home, at least you don't know specifically when he is contacting OW or visiting her. With mine I have a pretty good idea, like today and this weekend since he so blatently left yesterday.
Sorry, I don't have time for more now, will write more later. Hugs and strength to you......
Me - 38 Husband - 40 MLC! Together 12 years Married 11 years Still the love of my life Forever only lasted 10 years before his MLC and affair
