I have many questions that won't get answered right now, is there something with the deceased husband, MLC or is she truly sick of me?
I believe when we have a tragedy in life that is not dealt with and we try to sweep it under a rug by throwing ourselves into another situation (like a R), the results will come out in some other way at a later period. It takes time to really get through mourning the death of a spouse. So, considering how quickly the two of you M, she might not have faced her grief in a healthy way......IDK. Just saying that I have seen that happen and have studied it.
That's not to say that the answer is a D! But, if she went to a good professional C it might help her deal with what's she going through now.
When I had my EA, I had gone through years of "stuff". I mean it was one bad thing after the other. Maybe not as bad as some go through....but maybe worse than others. But it was my life that was affected and I reached the place I couldn't coop any more.....at least not effectively. I began trying to find an escape from my reality and hide my head in the sand. I found my escape through playing games over the Internet and then I started meeting people (men) on line. That led to the other stuff. Two months before that happened I would have told anyone they were crazy if they ever suspected I would be guilty of such a thing.
Did I talk about that to my H? No, b/c I had shut down to him. So, you are probably right in thinking that your W is holding something back. Whatever she's going through, she probably needs help, but it may not be you that can council her. You will have to help her like Bill was talking about.
Her feelings for you, her life, everything....is confused right now and she wants to get that all sorted out. You are going through a rough time of it, but if she's going through what I think she may....she is really suffering.
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
