I am right there with you guys on this. Whenever the subject of our lacking sex life comes up she tells me that I need to be happy with myself and that I should not make her responsible for my needs and that there must be something wrong with me for wanting to be physical with her so much. What can you say to that? Nothing. It is very distorted thinking on the part of the LDr. Sexual or physical intimacy needs cannot be met by themselves they REQUIRE the active participation of one's spouse.
I too am happy as a clam with myself. I exercise 4 times a week and am looking better than I have since high school. I am in great shape. I love my personality and my intellect. There are only two things I would change about myself. 1. I would like to be rich, and 2. I would like to have a fulfilling sex life with my spouse. That is it! Everything else in my life is excellent.
The fact of the situation is this. If you are a HDr and your spouse is not trying to resolve the situation in a way that is healthy for both of you, you are being abused. You can be happy all day long, singing songs, and frolicking down the lane, but if I come up and kick you in the teeth...you are going to bleed and not be happy. It is the same thing when a spouse does not treat your physical/sexual needs with the respect they deserve...except that you get kicked in the teeth every single day.
