Welcome back to the mix MHL, I hope your sitch is progressing in the positive direction it was before your brief sabbatical.
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Keep up this behavior, she will remember it. If you can consistently be this way around her it will add up over time. It only takes one word, one facial expression to erase weeks or even months of progress.
I'll tell you what the hardest part about the contact yesterday was looking her in the eye. I had a difficult time maintaining eye contact, it was awkward as was the whole encounter. I must say she seemed to be more relax and poised than me. I'm sure it is awkward for her as well though.
The thoughts I had of the OM weren't present during our interaction but they did storm my mind as she departed. I couldn't help but think she was off to see him as she bolted out of the house. I need to perish those thoughts.
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All the OM will burnout
I hope you are right. I believe as long as there is a OM involved in her life it will insulate her from the reality and emotional fall out assoicated with the D. I believe that is a big part of her need to keep a OM on the hook at all times. Consciously or subconsciously she is avoiding the pain of what is transpiring or so I think.
I'm looking forward to a weekend of heavy GALing as the kids are with the STBX. The weather has been perfect all week here and the weekend will be no different.
Wishing all a great weekend.
M48/W47 M15/T22 S3 D3 In House Separation 10/06/09 W files for D 10/16/09 OM1 discovered 10/28/09 (PA) OM2 in mix early Jan. W moved out 1/26/10 In Mediation (Settlement in prep)
Weather is great here too. Planing on getting out in the yard and doing something with the kids, bikes, hiking something outdoors. Hope you have a great weekend also. Good to be back here.
Formerly "missherlove"
Me49 XW49 M17 T19 S16 D20
Expose yourself to your deepest fear; after that, fear has no power, and the fear of freedom shrinks and vanishes. You are free.
Good to hear that. Enjoy your weekend with the kids.
A little yard work is in order for me as well. Looks like the house will be on the market in the next few weeks. To much brain damage trying to figure out how I can hold on to it solo.
I'm stoking up the Weber both days as well. It's grillin and chillin season.
M48/W47 M15/T22 S3 D3 In House Separation 10/06/09 W files for D 10/16/09 OM1 discovered 10/28/09 (PA) OM2 in mix early Jan. W moved out 1/26/10 In Mediation (Settlement in prep)
I am clean off my screened in porch tomorrow. Same on the grilling and chillin. looking to expand the menu at my house this year. I have really gotten into cooking since she's been gone.
Formerly "missherlove"
Me49 XW49 M17 T19 S16 D20
Expose yourself to your deepest fear; after that, fear has no power, and the fear of freedom shrinks and vanishes. You are free.
Grilling and BBQ are really the only things I do well as far as cooking is concerned. I need to ramp up the indoor game and soon, I'm not eating all that well during the week.
M48/W47 M15/T22 S3 D3 In House Separation 10/06/09 W files for D 10/16/09 OM1 discovered 10/28/09 (PA) OM2 in mix early Jan. W moved out 1/26/10 In Mediation (Settlement in prep)
Thanks for the tips DW anything beats tv dinners. GAL your A$$.
M48/W47 M15/T22 S3 D3 In House Separation 10/06/09 W files for D 10/16/09 OM1 discovered 10/28/09 (PA) OM2 in mix early Jan. W moved out 1/26/10 In Mediation (Settlement in prep)
Not bad DW. Very busy work week for me. Major event at the center I work at all week.
Not much to report on the sitch front at the moment. I've been in a pretty good place mentally the last few days. That usually means I'm due for a a couple of tough one's however. I'm probably going to need to break the NC status to discuss taxes, sale of the house and our parent teacher meeting that is apparently next week. To many loose ends to maintain total darkness.
The W is clearly operating under a NC policy with me as well. Probably best for both of us.
The kids will be with me this weekend and I need to get some grocery shopping done tonight in prep. for their arrival. I think I'll take them to the Zoo one day and get out for a hike and a playground session on the other.
How are things going for you?
M48/W47 M15/T22 S3 D3 In House Separation 10/06/09 W files for D 10/16/09 OM1 discovered 10/28/09 (PA) OM2 in mix early Jan. W moved out 1/26/10 In Mediation (Settlement in prep)
I am the same, a few pretty good days followed by some not so good days (when the realization of everything hits).
It is funny, I have the kids this weekend as well and was also thinking zoo. I also coach my D6 soccer team and S8 baseball team and we have practices and games this weekend so that will keep my busy.
I joined this professional oganiziation earlier in the week to help stay busy, especially when the kids are at mom's. It is pretty cool. It is more geared towards young professionals (just barely qualify) but they sponsor happy hours, hikes and mixers. Kind of weird do this type of thing but I already have a couple of new "friends".
I also spent some time working on my short and long term goals to give me some motivation and to help GAL; made me feel better.
You know this, but staying busy, which helps you feel good about yourself (confidence) is so important for us.
