on the other hand wish i had used Puppy's knowledge about A's and how to spot them a while back and maybe the SUCK would have a little less of a grip on me right now.
M-37 W-36 S-11, S-9, D-4 PA exposed 3/13/10 10/19/10 moving on... most up to date sit
ahhh...doesn't really matter...i had blinders on so unless it was W herself telling me i probably would not have beleived it....sort of like when i did find out...i didn't want to beleive it.
and the Suck returns...
M-37 W-36 S-11, S-9, D-4 PA exposed 3/13/10 10/19/10 moving on... most up to date sit
so now W and i are actively talking about our R particularly the past...things that lead us to drifft apart. She tells me the A was not result of where we were, but was her choice...and it is a choice she regrets making every day, she was not sure what she wanted nor why she did it.
right now i am willing to give a second chance (not to be confused wtih forgivness at this point). she did tell me something that i am not sure how to handle....she says she sees me as a controling "father" figure and does not want to have sex...she does back it up with she really does not want to feel that way about me but she feels all the crap that lead us to this point over the years has her seeing me in a bad light.
like i said i am a "physical" LL so this does not bode well with me. I continue to work on myself and admit my faults of the past.
any other suggestions on how to become attractive to my W sexually again?
M-37 W-36 S-11, S-9, D-4 PA exposed 3/13/10 10/19/10 moving on... most up to date sit
If what she says is true; and I heard the same from my W, you have to continue working on yourself. You have to get the reasons why she sees you as a "father" figure. What actions did you take prior the A? How was your behavior toward her? You will probably need her insight on how you behaved that led her to feel this way. These will be the areas in which you will need to do 180s.
If you can successfully ascertain what behaviors need to be modified and change them; then over time she will see that you are no longer that father figure.
If she's willing to reconcile; then a good MC should be able to help you guys determine how you got to this point.
In short, change those past behaviors, become strong and independent from her by GAL, and dress/smell nice. Her attraction to you might follow behind.
any other suggestions on how to become attractive to my W sexually again?
Confidence, Confidence, Confidence
Leadership
Strength - physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually
Be her partner - not her Father
Connect with her on a emotional/feeling level
Don't pursue - how many times here and every where else have you heard, "Women want what they can't have."
Find your mojo, you can handle it.
Cheers
M22,H45,W45 S21/18D12 Retain faith that you will prevail in the end, regardless of the difficulties and at the same time confront the most brutal facts of your current reality, whatever they might be.
