My husband is addicted to an emotional affair

[nicole8]

I do know that I can't control if the OW stays or goes. I am working to detach and not think about the situation so hopefully I don't cause myself anxiety. Lola thank you for the reminder that I can't control the situation.

I am just so confused, frustrated, annoyed and irritated. My h refuses to admit that the reason we drifted apart is because we spent no quality time together. I realize this isn't the only reason, but a huge factor. Along with the death of his father and depression that set in during his year long sickness. I never realized what was happening to my h and I didn't face it and I feel so horrible for not being there for him. Making him talk and tell me how he was feeling about everything. I failed him. But he's also failed me now by giving up.

I wish we could spend some good quality time together doing fun things. I'm unsure if I should try to do this with him and if he would even try. In his mind he still thinks we should be d and that he has failed me and there is no going back.

I'm talking with Chuck my db coach on Monday. I am going to try and get his perspective on what my husband and I need. I am still apprehensive about ignoring him (going dark) because I think that just gives him more ammo to want the d and that I don't care.