OIN- the truth is all of our problems suck b/c they are our problems, you are fortunate that yours are not as bad as others, but I know that doesn't make them any less of a problem for you...I feel for you and have been there- I was more crushed in your sitch than I am now and my W has vanished from my life and in the bed of OM.
I have finally accepted that I HAVE NO M, and likely NO 2nd CHANCE...
That being said- you are mind reading when you say W is rolling her eyes b/c you never complimented her and now you do...if she's still grieving OM and in full blown WAW mode- it is pursuing...
All sitches are diff, and sometimes a 180 is shot down and other times it is recieved...it's a effing mind game at best...if you're going to do it, don't be affected if her response is neg...
I do like Allens advice about paying W a compliment to a 3rd party...
Dont worry about the shyness either- no big deal- she's not your real W right now...just be consistant, strong, and a rock- hopefully she'll come around and when she does your changes are in place and you'll be more than ready
